Winter Soldier
by by7the7sea
Summary: One shot. Inspired by a scene in the Captain America movie where the Winter Soldier is struggling to remember who Cap was. Could also be considered a "what if" scenario.


**Disclaimer: **The Tomorrow People is the property of the CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

**Author****'****s Note:** _Italicized text_ indicates thoughts.

~ "text" ~ indicates telepathy

**xxx TTP xxx**

Everything was going as Jedikiah had hoped. John had performed well on several missions proving a need for the new organization. Now it was time to add some new recruits.

John's orders were to get in quickly, tranquilize Cara and Russell then teleport them back to Headquarters.

What actually happened was John teleported into the Refuge and quickly found Cara and Russell. As soon as they saw him, they ran over to him. They were so glad to see him, but John stepped back and held up the tranquilizer gun.

"Stay where you are, don't move," John ordered. He couldn't understand the look of recognition on their faces.

"John, what are you doing?" Cara said as she came to a stop and held up her hands.

~ "Stephen, I need you now. John's back, but something's wrong." Cara sent.

~ "I can't get away right now, but will be there as soon as I can. Should be there in five minutes." ~ Stephen replied.

"Yeah, buddy, what's up with the gun," Russell chimed in.

"How do you know my name?" John demanded. "All I know about you is you are part of my mission, so don't take another step."

"Mission?" It was Cara's turn to be confused. "What do you mean? What mission? Where have you been?"

She took a step forward and John shot her in the arm with the tranquilizer. Cara's face briefly registered shock before she fell to the ground unconscious.

At the same time John took the shot, Russell rushed over to him and grabbed the arm holding the gun. John tried to get Russell to let go of his arm, but he hung on tight. They wrestled a bit before John was able to overpower and knock him out.

The commotion had drawn the attention of the other Refuge residents and when John looked up, he was almost surrounded. At the front of the group were Irene and Charlotte. Both pleading for him to stop.

John only took a moment to register the looks on both their faces before teleporting out of there.

Irene's confusion and Charlotte's hopefulness were lingering in his mind as he made his way back to Jedikiah. There was something pulling at his mind begging him to remember, but he couldn't. Nothing was there.

**xxx TTP xxx **

Jedikiah was in the middle of writing up a new proposal to cover additional agents when John suddenly appeared in his office.

A bit startled, Jedikiah said as he looked up "I didn't hear you come in. How ... did ..." He trailed off as he got a good look at John. There John stood in what was usually an immaculate suit, but now was completely disheveled. His shirt was wrinkled and untucked. The suit jacket was completely crumpled and one sleeve was hanging on by a thread.

"What happened?" Jedikiah stood up and walked over to John. "Are you okay?"

"It was ...," John struggled to say anything. The memories still haunting him, almost taunting him. There was more to this. He felt like he should know, but didn't have the memories to back it up. "I teleported in, just like you said, but then ..."

"Then what, John? What's wrong?" Jedikiah was starting to get concerned. It wasn't like John to be so distant and confused.

"How would they know me?" John looked earnestly at Jedikiah.

"You are my top agent," Jedikiah said confidently. "Your reputation must have preceded you."

"No, that's not it," John shook his head. "They were glad to see me. But it's more than that too."

"Now, John," Jedikiah stepped forward and put a hand on John's shoulder. "Maybe they were just trying to distract you. Follow me."

Jedikiah had a feeling that another treatment was necessary. It would take away all of John's confusion, help him to focus on the job once more. Jedikiah couldn't have John distracted like this. It would hurt their mission, not to mention threaten their relationship. He did not want to lose John again.

**xxx TTP xxx **

Jedikiah lead John into the lab. He started preparations to give John another round of drug therapy ... the one that took his memories away.

"Who are they, Jedikiah?" John asked earnestly. The confusion was etched across his face. He felt like he should know them, but no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't find them in his memory. "They seemed certain that we were friends. Jed, what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing is wrong with you, John," Jedikiah walked over and grabbed John by the shoulders and guided him over to a chair, then continued preparing the injections.

"Jed, it feels like something is missing. A part of my life that was very important to me," John said as he looked at Jedikiah with pleading and sadness in his eyes. Almost inconceivably, there was also trust there. Jedikiah has been with him the whole time. Guided him through everything that has happened to him over the years ... at least from what he can remember.

Jedikiah didn't like seeing John like this, struggling to figure out what was going on. Should he stop wiping his memories whenever they threatened to return? He wasn't sure what else to do. He loved being able to work with John again, having him back in his life. It was going so well. They almost had a normal father-son relationship ... or as normal of one as they could have under the circumstances. He wasn't alone any more. He missed his brother and having John around took some of that pain away.

"John, just go through this one more time. It will make you feel better and would be best for everyone concerned," Jedikiah explained to him. He almost pleaded with John to understand and agree to it.

"I don't know," John stated softly. He continued to struggle with this. "I know you said this was important, but I'm not so sure anymore."

John looked off into the distance. He seemed to be more and more dazed and confused.

Jedikiah came over to him and knelt before him, grabbing John's neck to make sure they made eye contact. "Come on, John. This will help you focus."

John's eyes started to water and he tried to look away from Jedikiah. There was still something lingering on the outer reaches of his mind. He started to feel like his memory was filled with walls, almost like a maze. Each way he tried to go was a dead end.

"Son, please," Jedikiah said. "This will help. If you don't do this, I could lose you."

Jedikiah regretted letting that last bit slip out, but he was getting desperate. Seeing John so lost and confused was hurting him too. He loved him like a son and never wanted to cause him all this pain. Why couldn't John see that? "_How could he when he doesn't know what to look for,_" Jedikiah's conscience responded.

The truth was that Jedikiah was getting tired of fighting this. If not for what they had experienced in this time together, he might have truly regretted removing John's memories.

The fact of the matter was that the formula was flawed and not going to last. The rate at which he was having to reinforce the treatment was increasing. He never should have trusted something like this to somebody else's research.

His resolve slipping, Jedikiah looked at John again.

John sat in the chair with his head hanging down. He was exhausted from the strain of trying to remember and not being able to ... being blocked at every turn. He was on the verge of despair.

"John," Jedikiah said sadly, "go, go get some sleep. We'll discuss this in the morning."

Jedikiah was at war with himself, but this time the side that was tired of this was winning. Watching John as he left the room, he could see the toll this was taking on the young man.

Jedikiah, usually so self-confident, for once in his life wasn't sure what tomorrow would bring. He really didn't know how long it would take for the memories to come back once he stopped the treatment. Although he didn't think it would take too long, especially since the memories seemed to be hounding John.

**xxx TTP xxx**

Once his head hit the pillow, John was asleep. He was exhausted from the events of the day, the physical and emotional strain draining his energy. He didn't even bother changing or getting under the covers, he just collapsed on the bed and fell asleep.

**xxx TTP xxx**

Having cleaned up and put everything away in the lab, Jedikiah headed back to his room, but made a slight detour to check on John. He stopped at the entrance of John's room and leaned on the door frame for a moment. John was sound asleep on his stomach, his arms wrapped around the pillow and facing away from the door. Jedikiah walked around the bed then knelt down and gently placed his hand on John's neck.

"Please, don't leave me," Jedikiah said. "You're the only family I have left. I do care about you, son."

He only stayed a few moments more before heading back to his room.

**xxx TTP xxx**

While John slept, it was as if the flood gates of his memory opened up and the walls came crumbling down. The memories flowed through his dreams as if he were watching a TV show, not realizing what they were. Suddenly, he opened his eyes and a name was waiting on his lips.

"Cara," he said softly. He sat up in bed and searched his memories. There he found Cara, Russell, Charlotte, Irene and many others.

He looked around the room and was momentarily confused. _"Where am I?"_ The formerly hidden memories temporarily overriding the recent ones.

John closed his eyes and concentrated on sorting them all out. Once he did, he had an overwhelming desire to reunite with his once-forgotten friends.

He jumped out of bed, took a quick shower and threw on some casual clothes.

He headed to the front door and only stopped when he heard Jedikiah.

"Where are you going?" Jedikiah asked.

John hesitated, he wasn't sure how to deal with this ... confronting Jedikiah. He slowly turned around to face his mentor.

"To see the ones you had taken from me," John said somberly.

"Are you coming back?" Jedikiah almost sounded nervous. A casual acquaintance would not have picked up on it, but John noticed.

"I don't know," John replied and continued walking to the door.

Jedikiah followed him and said, "I need you to know ... above everything else, any other reasons or excuses you may hear, I did this because ... it was the only way I could take back what I did to you."

John closed his eyes, absorbing that last bit of information. This wasn't something he would easily get over. It was another betrayal of his trust.

"John, just remember I gave you my brother, his powers," Jedikiah making one more attempt to persuade the young man. "We make a good team."

With that, John turned and teleported.

**The End **


End file.
